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May 19

บทเพลงนี้ไม่เหมาะต่อการฟังหน้าฝน  ไม่เหมาะต่อการทำซึ้ง แต่เหมาะสำหรับทำซ้ำและช้ำ

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                      ภาพจากผู้จัดกวน ชื่อภาพ : หยู่ฮู!!ในไม้ป่าเดียวกัน(อันนี้ตั้งเอง)

 

               ฝนหยดแหมะๆ สักครู่ก็ร่วงลงมา ซู่ ซู่…

 

               อากาศดูเป็นใจมากที่จะนั่งเล่นมิวสิคในรถ  ฮัมเพลงเบาๆ มองสายน้ำที่ไหลผ่านกระจกหน้า ที่ปัดน้ำฝนตวัดไปมาคอยให้จังหวะ

 

              ไฟแดง รถติด  ใจลอย…บทเพลงถูกงัดออกมาจากลิ้นชักความจำ ทีละเพลงๆจากเก่ามาใหม่  จากใหม่ย้อนวันอันน่ารัก น่าชัง  สู่วัยที่เริ่ม หน้าเกลียด  หน้าชัง(ตัวเอง อิอิ)

 

              “แม้วแร็พ”ก็แล้ว  “E-pen แร็พ” ก็มาแล้ว   ฝนตกน้ำท่วมขัง  ล้อรถสาดน้ำคลำกระเด็น…เป็นอะไรไม่รู้พลันนั้น คิดอยากจะร้อง “รักในโฟนอิน” อัลบั๊มใหม่ของ “พี่กีร์  อมฮอล์ล (Before) (After : พี่ขะลี่ บวมฉุ  )”  ของเหล่า “เรด รถแก๊ส”  ที่ต่อมามีคนหวังดีแนะให้เปลี่ยนชื่อใหม่เป็น “รักในเรือนจำ” แทน

 

              ความที่เป็นเพลงใหม่เกิน  เพิ่งโปรโมทผ่านทีวีช่องน้อยหอยสังข์ของคุณพี่สาทิดไปเมื่อวันก่อนเต็มๆ (ประหลาดแท้ ช่องดีสเตชั่นถูกปิดด้วยน้ำมือรัฐบาลช่วงประกาศพ.ร.ก.ฉุกเฉิน ด้วยข้อกล่าวหาปลุกระดมทำให้สังคมแตกแยก แต่ข่าวสารของเรด รถแก๊สในกาลต่อมากลับมีช่องทางออกอากาศสื่อสารกับหมู่มวลสมาชิกได้สม่ำเสมอที่ช่องนี้ มืหนำซ้ำออกยาวๆด้วยละ) ผมจึงไม่ทราบว่า เนื้อร้องทำนองเพลงนี้เป็นอย่างไร แต่พอจะนึกถึงเพลงเก่าๆของนักร้องคนนี้ได้อยู่บ้าง

 

             เพลงดังๆของเขาเมื่อครั้งอดีตมีหลายเพลง  อืมม์…ผมรื้อฟื้นความจำนิดหน่อย ประกอบกับใช้กูเกิ้ลช่วยหา เนื้อเพลง “เธอลำเอียง” หนึ่งในเพลงที่คุ้นหูก็ปรากฏมาดังนี้…แต่ช้าก่อน!…

 

            …ในเมื่อวันนั้นกับวันนี้ของพี่กีร์-พี่ขะลี่ เหมือนเป็นคนละคน  เปรียบไปก่อนนี้เป็นน้ำท่วมขังวันนี้กลับกลายเป็นน้ำคลำ ดำๆเขียวๆคล้ำๆ  “เธอลำเอียง” จึงต้องถามว่า ใครลำเอียงหา?…น่าจะเป็น ไม่ใครก็ใครละ “แกซิลำเอียง”  ไม่เชื่อถามแม้ว ถามเจ๊เพ็ญดูเดะ

 

พี่บอก เธอลำเอียง : บนทางเดินจากวันนั้น ที่เคยฝันร่วมกันอยู่เคียง

ขอบอก แกซิลำเอียง: บนทางเดินจากวันนั้น ไม่คิดฝันจะร่วมแกอยู่เคียง

          เสียงที่พร่ำบอกไม่ได้แกล้งหลอก จะมีเราสองคนอย่างนี้

          เสียงที่พร่ำบอกว่า โฟนอินแกล้งหลอก จะมีเราสองคนอย่างนั้นอย่างนี้

          เธอเจอใครที่มั่งมี ต่อแต่นี้เรามีกันเป็นสาม

          แกเจอใครล่ะที่มั่งมี ต่อแต่นี้เรามีE-penรวมเป็นสาม

          เขาเป็นคู่แข่ง      เข้ามาข้องเกี่ยว   เกี่ยวเอาใจของเธอจากไป

          เขา(เธอ)เป็นคู่แข่ง เข้ามาข้องเกี่ยว เกี่ยวเอาใจของแม้วจากไป

          ความจริงใจฉันเป็นอาทร   ฉันแสดงออกมาจากใจ

          ความจริงวันนี้มันฟ้องแกเอาแต่หลอน ฉันอุตส่าห์แสดงออกมาจากใจ

          ตัวเราเองไม่มีอะไร     ที่คอยให้จึงต่างกับเขา

          ใช่ซี้…ตัวกีร์เองไม่มีอะไร   ที่คอยให้จึงต่างกับเขา(เธอ)

          เธอจึงมองข้ามไปดังเงา     ทิ้งให้เศร้าบนความฝันเดิม

          แม้วจึงมองข้ามไปดังเงา   ทิ้งให้เศร้าบนความฝันเดิม

          ความปราชัย     ที่เธอลำเอียง     จะต้องเสียใจคงหมดเธอ

          ความปราชัย(ซ้ำแล้วซ้ำอีก)ที่แกอำเอียง  ขอให้เสียจนหมดตัวนะเออ

          ฉันนั่งมองเหม่อ น้ำตานองเอ่อปลอบใจเราทุกวันคนแพ้

          ต่อให้แกนั่งมองเหม่อ  น้ำตานองเอ่อปลอบใจแกทุกวันคนแพ้

          ฉันนั่งมองเหม่อ น้ำตานองเอ่อ ปลอบใจเราทุกวันคนแพ้

          มองไปเถอะ เหม่อไปเถอะ น้ำตานองเถอะ  ยังไงๆก็คนแพ้

         วันและคืน  จะบวกใจ   เก็บความหมายรักเราให้ยาวนาน

         วันและคืน จะบวกใจ  เก็บความแค้นเกลียดแกให้ยาวนาน

        ที่เธอเคยบอก   ฉันยังจำมั่น   จะให้ความสำคัญต่อกัน

        ที่เคยโฟนบอก ฉันยังจำมั่น  ว่าวันนั้นจะจ่ายเท่านี้เท่านั้น

        ฉันนั่งมองเหม่อ น้ำตานองเอ่อ ปลอบใจเราแทนเธอทุกวัน…..คนแพ้

        ฉันจะแช่งแก ให้ต้องนั่งเหม่อ  น้ำตานองเอ่อต่อไปแทนแม้วทุกวัน…คนแพ้

 

               พี่ขลี่ครับ…บอกตรงๆผมร้องๆยังไงก็ร้องเพลงนี้อีกต่อไปไม่ได้แล้ว เนื้อร้องที่ผมเคยหลงไปชอบมันเปลี่ยนและแปลงไป  ยิ่งเห็นรถติดไฟแดงแล้วสแลงใจ   ผมพยายามจนสุดความสามารถ กลั้นฉี่ไว้ยังไม่ลำบากเท่า ใจไม่ด้านพอ จ๋ายไม่ด้านพลอ…จริงๆ

 

               ถามจริงๆเถอะ ใครเข้าฝันพี่ ตุ๊ดตู่  หรือ นัดวุด ไม่มีใคร ทัดทาน พี่บ้างหรือครับ ไอ้รักในโฟนอินเนี่ย   แบบว่ามัน ไม่เจียม นะพี่

 

               พี่ก็รู้  เวทีนี้ไม่มีพี่เลี้ยง  ยอมยกธง เถอะ  คนมันหมดลาน  ไขไปฝันเก่าๆฝันไปก็เท่านั้น พ่อพี่ไม่ใช่ นักสู้ที่ดี หรอก   ฝันมีชีวิต ให้ดำเนินต่อไปอย่างคนไทยทั่วไปที่รักสงบรักดีไม่ดีหรือ?  ขนาดนี้แล้วยังหวังว่าเขาจะแบ่ง  ครึ่งทางใ มาให้พี่  หึหึ ละเมอซิไม่ว่า  อยากจะหัวเราะให้ฮอล์ลหลุดออกมาจากปาก พี่ก็เป็นได้แค่ลิ่วล้อ ของเขา E-pen ยังไปได้ดีกว่าพี่อีก ขานั้นเจตนายังเหมือนเดิม เลยแหละนังคนนี้ หมิ่นฟ้ายังไงก็ยังหมินอยู่เช่นนั้น กบฎพยัคฆ์ทมิฬอีแลมยังไม่ร้ายเท่า  นังนี่กบฎพยัคฆ์ทมิฬ(หินชาติ)E-pen ชัดๆ ผมจะจำจนเจ็บเข้ากระดูกก็จะไม่มีวันลืมเหมือนพี่ตอนนี้เลย

 

              พี่ปลื้มพ่อแม้วพี่ก็ปลื้มไป  พี่คิดว่าเป็นความรักที่ไม่รู้จบ  อ้วกน่า ผมก็ไม่รู้ว่า พี่ใช้อะไรคิดนะ เขา ทิ้ง เห็นๆ โฟนมาบอกเหล่าคนแดงบอกว่าจงเข้มแข็ง  โถ…ตัวเอง ใจฝ่อ อยู่ทางโน้น แล้วยังมาถาม หนาวถึงคนทางนี้หรือเปล่า  หนาวแน่…ขอบอก

 

              รักในโฟนอิน ตำหนิใครดีละ…ก็ต้องตำหนิพ่อของพวกพี่นั่นแหละ  ตำหนิใจ  เน่าน่าพี่ที่ผ่านมาๆมาเขาบอกพวกพี่ว่ารักเสมอใจ  พอมีคนหลงเชื่อก็เลยคิดว่า มีแต้มต่อ แต่เป็นเพราะ ใจประมาท ก็เลยพังพาบลงมาอย่างที่เห็น

 

             พี่ร้องให้ตาย….เกณฑ์คนมาเต้นเป็นแดนซ์เซอร์ให้หัวหลุด  พี่แม้วก็ใช่ว่า จะมาตายกับพวกพี่  คราวก่อนเขาโฟนมาว่า เสียงปืนแตกบอกจะมาๆ ไหนอ่ะ ไหน ลืมเขาเถอะ เชื่อผม  ก่อนที่ ฟ้าลืม พวกพี่

 

             ฝนยังตก  ทั้งหมดนี้  คือ เสียงรำพึงดังๆแข่งกับสายฝนของผมเท่านั้น…พี่ขลี่  ผมไม่หวังว่าพี่จะได้ยินจริงๆหรอกนะ อิอิ

 

             อ้อ…หากเพลงที่ผมคัดลอกมาเรียงร้อยต่อกันขาดตกบกพร่องตกหล่นต้องขออภัย เสิร์ชมาได้เท่านี้ก็กลัวใจตัวเองจะแย่แล้ว แถมฟ้าร้องครืนๆ  ผมกลัวฟ้าฝ่าลงมา  ใจไม่ด้านพอ…จ๋ายไม่ด้านพอ(ว่ะพี่).

8,043 Responses to “รักในโฟนอิน เธอลำเอียง…ใจไม่ด้านพอ(ว่ะพี่)”

  1. ve Says:

    ความสามารถสุดยอดในการคิดเพลงมาประกอบกับบทความ

  2. pijika Says:

    ไอ้เราก็นึกว่า เป็นแฟนคลับพี่ขะลี่มาเอง
    เอาชื่อเพลงตะแกมาเล่นซ้า…เพียบบบ…
    ทีหนายได้ เสิร์จมาต๊ะหาก (ครีเอทีฟ เจรงงง)

    แต่ฮา… ค่ะ คุณน้อง S

    ฮาแตก (ยังถึงกะขะลี่แตกขะลี่แตน)
    ขออย่างนึง
    เวลาพูดถึงไอ้ศักดา (ชื่อเก่ามันตั้งแต่เกิด) เนี่ย
    อย่าให้มันอมพี่ได้มั้ย!!!

    อยากอ๊วก… กร๊ากกกกก…

  3. sazzie Says:

    เขารักของเขาอ่ะเพื่อน อิอิ

    แซวพี่ฮอลล์หน่อยนะคะ “อย่าให้มันอมพี่ได้มั้ย!!!”
    นึกภาพมันอ้าปากยังไม่ทันอมพี่ หนูก็แขยงแทนแล้วค่ะ 55555

  4. showshow Says:

    สวัสดีครับคุณve ต้องขอบคุณดินฟ้าอากาศและสายฝนที่โปรยปรายครับงานนี้:)

  5. showshow Says:

    สวัสดีครับพี่ฮอล์ล 55555นึกไม่ถึงๆว่าพี่เราจะมีอารมณ์ขันที่ร้ายกาจบาดลึกลงไปตั้งแต่ปากลงไปถึงลำไส้ยิ่งกว่าพี่ขลี่อมฮอล์ล เอ๊ย! ไม่อมแล้ว5555

  6. showshow Says:

    สวัสดีครับคุณเพื่อน…ก็ไม่ว่าอะไรพี่เขาหรอก เพียงแต่เห็นภาพทางทีวีวันแถลงข่าวเปิดอัลบัมทางช่อง11วานซืนแล้วขมขื่นใจจริงๆเชียว :)

  7. kenjionline Says:

    น่าจะเป็นเพลงร้องนะครับ อิอิ
    กำลังหาเพลงแนว dance อยู่ครับ
    แต่ยังไม่มีอันไหนถูกใจ ว่าจะทำ PEN DANCE ซะหน่อย อิอิ

  8. Aee Says:

    ภาพจักรภพฮามาก

  9. showshow Says:

    ทำเลย ทำเลยคุณkenji อยากฟัง เอาแบบNobodyอายม้วนต้วนนะครับ 55555

  10. hataraki Says:

    ไม่กล้าร้องเพลงแกค่ะ
    กลัวหน้าพี่แก
    พวกนี้ไปทำอะไรมาหว่า
    หน้าใกล้เคียงผียกแก๊งค์
    อุๆ

  11. showshow Says:

    เข้ากันดีกับไม้ป่านี้นะครับคุณAee อิอิ

  12. showshow Says:

    สวัสดีครับคุณhataraki ผมมาลองสังเกตุชื่อเพลงของพี่ขลี่นี้แล้วเพลงผ่านมาหลายปีแล้วแต่ดูเหมือนแต่งให้แกและพรรคพวกในวันนี้ยังไงไม่รู้นะฮะ:)

  13. hataraki Says:

    มานั่งดูอีกรอบ ชื่อเพลงที่มาเรียงร้อยเป็นเรื่อง
    “ลิ่วล้อ” น่าจะเหมาะกับ
    ขลี่และพลพรรค ดั่งจับวางเชียวค่ะ
    อิอิ

  14. showshow Says:

    อะนะ เห็นด้วยสุดๆครับ:)

  15. เลิกอมฮอลล์ Says:

    เมื่อไหร่ไอ้กี้มันจะอมเหรียญบาทครับ

  16. แก้วก๊อ Says:

    ฮาสุดๆเล้ย แต่หยะแหยงนะพี่ที่ให้Iกี้ มันอมขลี้ แค่เห็นรูปEpen มันคงกระดี้กระด้านะที่จะให้มันอมของ I กี้ที่ไม่ใช่ขลี้น่ะ พี่คิดได้ไงแต่งเพลงใหม่ง่ะ ขออนุญาตพี่ที่จะforward mailให้เพื่อนๆอ่านนะ

  17. kacharaj Says:

    ฮากับคุณshowshow เจ้าของบ้าน

    แม่นขนาดนี้ต้องยกให้เป็นแฟนพันธุ์แท้พี่ขะลี่ เลยนะเนี่ย อิๆๆๆ

    และขอฮากับความเห็นที่15ด้วยครับ

    ให้มันอมเหรียญเร็วๆนะครับ 5555

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